Thanks to Chase Kip for the idea for this blog! You can watch his short explained videos on video games on Youtube!
WARNING: THIS SECTION MAY AND WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS, AND IS SUPER LONG, SO IF YOU ARE PLAYING THE GAME RIGHT NOW, YOU SHOULD EXIT THIS BLOG, AND PREPARE YOURSELF FOR BOREDOM, I GUESS. OH, YOU SHOULD ALSO READ THE LAST SIX BLOGS SO THIS WON’T BE CONFUSING FOR YOU.
We were back when…
Our heroes, Pit the angel and Palutena, the goddess of light, took flight once again and defeated the goddess of darkness and the leader of the Underworld, Medusa. But not before realizing that the ACTUAL leader of the Underworld and enemy, Hades, was using her as a distraction. Pit and Palu then took flight again and faced a new enemy, Viridi, the goddess of nature, a neutral character that hates the Underworld army and views humans as her #1 enemy (besides Pit, of course). Then the Aurum come by and everyone (Pit, Palu, Viridi and Hades) is like “frick the Aurum” and drive the Aurum away from the Earth. Palutena then gets possessed by something called the Chaos Kin and Pit rescues her and gets his wings burnt off in the process and Dark Pit also known as Pittoo saves Pit from dying and defeats Pandora who is the source of Pittoo’s unlimited flight ability and BLAH BLAH BLAH (I am not explaining all of this to you, read the last six blogs to get all caught up). We then ended with Pit and Palutena getting ready for the FINAL BATTLE!!!!
And so, Palutena guides Pit to Hades, where then there is the FINAL BATTTTLLLLEEE! And Pit equips the Three Sacred Treasures (from Parts 1 to 4). At first the battle against Hades is equal, peace and happiness (actually the battle was fair at first, but without the “peace and happiness and tra-lalalala”), until Hades then VORES Pit into his stomach, no really, HE DID. This leaves Pit in Hades’s stomach and now he has to find his way out before he gets, uhhh…. digested? Or something like that? And he has to do this without Palutena’s help (yo seriously, she can hear Pit from, like, 1,000,000 miles away and she CAN’T hear through a god’s BELLY? actually, let’s get that out of our heads and move on). Also, the Three Sacred Treasures at this point…. ARE NOW BUSTED! BUSTED, BUSTED, BUSTED! Sorry, I couldn’t help myself. Anyway, Pit manages to guide himself through Hades’s belly, while talking to himself, of course. Then Pit then has a Boss Battle with Hades’s HEART, and defeats the latter. The heart then EXPLODES, creating a hole for Pittoo to put Pit out of Hades and for Palutena to pull back the two of them, saying to the Lord of the Underworld, quote, “Goodbye, Hades! :)” before leaving. But it turns out that even if your heart is blown up, it doesn’t stop the Lord of the Underworld.
With the Three Sacred Treasures becoming useless, Pit and Palutena hit the Pause button and find a substitute for the Three Stupid Treasures (get it? because the three sacred treasures are busted and- okay sorry, I hate the puns I make). So, then Palutena guides Pit to the God of the Forge, Dynatos. whom challenges Pit to three challenges, then he gets the thing that stops Hades, called the Great Sacred Treasure. Pit then accepts the three challenges, and battles Cragalanche, who I forgot to mention, was the very first general you battle. Anyway, Pit battles Cragalanche on the first trial, battles Magnus and Gaol on the Second, a fake Palutena on the third, oh did I forget to mention that Palutena got put to sleep by Dynatos when Palu and Dynatos are about, what? 10,000 miles away from each other? Anyway, after Pit defeats the Great Sacred Treasures himself and Palutena wakes up, Pit finally has the Great Sacred Treasures for himself, creating a lot of chaos while he was at it.
And so, with the power of god and anime on his side, *snort* *cough cough* *choke* *wheeze*, sorry, sorry, redo, that did NOT HAPPEN. And so, with the power of god and anime on his side, Pit flies to Hades for the ACTUAL final battle. And it does not go so well! Hades is already stronger and the whole battle takes the WHOLE CHAPTER out! And before Hades releases the final blow on Pit, it looked like the end….
But then… PLOT TWIST! A resurrected Medusa comes out of the shadows and gives Hades a strict uppercut, being sick of being Hades’s “puppet”. Hades then punches Medusa, destroying her once and for all, giving enough time for Palutena to charge up the laser cannon of the broken down Great Sacred Treasure, Pit to shoot the laser, and to destroy Hades once and for all. Pit then soars through the sky with the people cheering beneath him, Viridi then complains that humans are stupid blah blah blah, Palutena then tells Viridi to let Pit celebrate his victory, and then the scene ends with Pit and Dark Pit (with the Power of Flight mind you from Palutena, Pit has Viridi’s Power of Flight due to the battle with Hades) flying together into the sunset. Credits play, but for real this time. Ever since that game, Kid Icarus has not had a sequel in years. Looks like there might not be any more Kid Icarus…
OR WILL THERE? In Super Smash Bros Ultimate, Viridi then reveals that the WAR AIN’T OVER YET! And that is true alright, the sequel will come out in 21 years. Wait, 21 YEARS?! I’ll be 24 years old by then! THAT’S TOO LONG!! But wait, Sakurai might have changed his mind. Now, we should patiently wait for him to wrap up that Smash Bros series. “Sakurai says Smash Bros Ultimate Might Not End The Series”. Oh he’s making more of them. We will NEVER get a new Kid Icarus Game…
BUT WAIT! We shouldn’t end the video like THIS. Let’s think about positives for Kid Icarus! Umm… Palutena and Dark Pit got into Smash Bros with Pit so THAT’S good! Kid Icarus is available on the Super NES for the Nintendo Online Membership, THAT’S good! Masahiro Sakurai still does not want to make a new sequel to Kid Icarus. WAIT WAIT WAIT, that’s bad. You know what, I’m just going to put links of some pictures of Palutena and Pit from the anime. Thanks for reading! (I really don’t want this to be published okay?)
Resources:
The Idea from Chase Kip on YouTube
Sakurai says Smash Bros Ultimate Might Not End The Series
A Picture of Palutena from the anime
A Picture of Pit from the anime
Hope you enjoyed this wacky series of blogs!
– Nova Subedi