Kid Icarus Explained: Suited and Rebooted (Part 5: The New Quest)

Hey again, everybody! I’m continuing this series until the end, but as you have seen from the previous blogs, I’ll take some breaks from the series every once in a while. Hope you enjoy!

KIE: S&R: Kid Icarus Explained: Suited and Rebooted (Part 4: The Start of a Franchise)

First Part of the Original KIAE (cringe warning)

So back where we left off (in Kid Icarus: Of Myths and Monsters), Palutena decides to find help after she realizes the nightmare she has was actually a premonition of sorts. And who does she enlist to help as that person has done so before? Pit, of course! However, it seems like she hasn’t bonded with Pit enough to trust his reliability…

——-

Palutena: Pit, I have a very important mission for you!

Pit: (saluting) Yes, Lady Palutena!!

Palutena: (face determined, smiles) I have heard that there are going to be demons attacking the city, called the Orcos. So I want you to do the very honor (holds out both hands showing the bow she gave Pit years ago, which he used to defeat Medusa) to defeat all of the demons coming here!

Pit: (pumps up a fist) On it!

(Pit turns around and almost runs out of Palutena’s temple smiling, but Palutena calls out for him)

Palutena: (visibly frustrated) WAIT! I WASN’T FINISHED YET! GET BACK HERE!!!!

(Pit stops running, and walks back to the goddess, embarrassed of his deed)

Palutena: But, you aren’t ready for facing this new threat, so I decided to do something… (blushes) but you might be a little frustrated to hear what I have done for your training.

Pit: …I have to use the Three Sacred Treasures, don’t I?

Palutena: …Yes.

Pit: (beams) But that’s awesome! I haven’t used the Three Sacred Treasures in a long time!

Palutena: … No… it’s the way how you’re supposed to get them…

Pit: (starts looking skeptical) What about that?

Palutena: (looks uncertain if she should tell him)… Erm… I… kinda put them in fortresses…. protected by some monsters I hired… and you have to defeat them… to get the treasures back.

Pit: (looks at the goddess as she smiles sheepishly, his face in shock, inhales)…. WHY WOULD YOU DO THA-

——-

So yeah, Palutena, thinking that Pit wasn’t ready to defeat a boatload of demons (even though he destroyed a literal goddess all by himself), so she put each of the Three Sacred Treasures in a fortress, guarded by a fortress boss (like last time, ey Palu?)

But instead of Hewdraw, Twinbellows and Pandora again (because why would Palutena bring back Medusa’s cronies, that’s just wrong…), other monsters where hired instead to guard each one. Not to mention that each fortress in each of the three worlds: the Underworld (where Pit first started his journey), the Overworld (where the humans and other lowly creatures reside) and in Skyworld (where Angel Land is located).

The guardians are:

Minotaur: Half-bull, half-man, the Minotaur is a strong beast that guards the Underworld Fortress

Skull Wing: A… literal skull that can fly. It guards the Overworld Fortress

Fire Serpent: A snake that flies and shoots fire, basically the Hewdraw ripoff. This guy guards the Skyworld Fortress.

——-

<flashback to 2 weeks before Pit came to receive Palutena’s mission>

(shows the three fortress bosses in front of Palutena)

Minotaur: …So you said you wanted to get three monsters to guard your weapons?

Palutena: Yep. Pretty much. What are your strengths?

Skull Wing: We.. all have projectiles we can shoot at opponents!

Fire Serpent: Two of us can fly!

Minotaur, Skull Wing and Fire Serpent: But we all have very predictable strategies so that our battles aren’t too hard!

(silence enters the rooms for a few minutes, Palutena looking at the three with a blank stare, seeming to try to decide if she wants to give them the task)

Palutena: … You three are perfect for the job.

Minotaur, Skull Wing and Fire Serpent: (excited) WOO!

(the three start celebrating on the spot to this music, Palutena watching with exasperation, until Fire Serpent opens his mouth to speak)

Fire Serpent: What’s our reward for this?

Palutena: (shrugs) Oh, getting beaten up in the hand of an angel and dying because of that, nothing else much.

(the three monsters stop celebrating, and all look at the goddess with shock, trembling)

Minotaur: Wait, wha-

Palutena: (claps hands together, smiling) You’re HIRED, guys!

——-

So then Pit has to train up against the demons, get the Three Sacred Treasures and save Angel Land once again.

See you all next time!

– Nova S